Sexual Purity

Kevin D. Beard

There was a time when discussing sexuality was off limits in polite company. Sadly, that time has passed away for the general American public. So much change in that area has occurred that it is now not at all uncommon to see and hear references to sexuality in all sorts of places. Of course the entertainment industry has led the way in bringing about this change. Whether it is movies, television, or music, sex dominates the entertainment landscape today.

What has been the result of this growing emphasis on sexuality? Staggering increases in pre-marital sex, teen and unwed pregnancies, sexually transmitted diseases, marital unfaithfulness, homosexuality, and so on. Some seem to view these changes as progress and intellectual enlightenment. Christians ought to view them as reason to weep.

Because of these unfortunate circumstances, Christians need to be plain-spoken with young people regarding sexual purity. If we assume that children will acquire a biblical view of sex just because they have Christian parents, and just because they have been in Bible classes and worship assemblies all their lives, we may learn the hard way that such assumptions were foolish.

We need to teach our young people that sex is only for people who are married to each other. God established this principle in the beginning. He saw that it was not good for man to be alone in the earth, so He made a companion for him: a woman. This companion was to be the perfect complement for man. However, God intended for people to establish life-long partnerships in marriage. Because of this, He said, “Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh” (Gen. 2:24). This was the beginning of marriage. In this relationship, husband and wife become “one flesh.” This includes the sexual relationship. Because God ordained this, the bed in marriage is undefiled (Heb. 13:4).

We need to teach our young people that sex outside of marriage is fornication. Paul said, “Nevertheless, to avoid fornication, let every man have his own wife, and let every woman have her own husband” (1 Cor. 7:2). Any kind of sexual act between two people outside of marriage is called “fornication.” In the Bible this word has a very broad meaning. Notice what Paul said: “To avoid fornication, let every man have his own wife, and let every woman have her own husband.” When a man and his own wife have sex, they avoid fornication, because that is the way God intended for it to be. But when a man has sex with someone who is not his own wife, or a woman has sex with someone who is not her own husband, it is fornication. From this we can see that the sin of fornication can involve all kinds of illicit sexual acts. It includes that between two unmarried people, one married person and one unmarried person, two married people (who are not married to each other), two men, two women, and every other kind of sexual perversion imaginable, including bestiality (sex with an animal) and incest (sex with a family member).

Fornication has always been an abomination in God’s eyes. Under the law of Moses, sexual sins were punishable by death (Lev. 20:10-16). Evidently God wanted the people of Israel to stay away from sexual sin. In the New Testament, fornication is mentioned often. It is a part of all the familiar listings of sinful things (Rom. 1:28-32; 1 Cor. 6:9-10; Gal. 5:19-21; Col. 3:5-7). It appears in the form of “whoremongers” (those who commit fornication) in Revelation 21:8. As this passage clearly states, these people “shall have their part in the lake which burneth with fire and brimstone: which is the second death.”

Young people (and older people alike, but especially young people) need to make the commitment to keep themselves sexually pure. Some in American society today seem to think that it is preposterous to propose such a thing, but that is not so. Young people can keep themselves pure, and every faithful Christian young person will do so. Here are some suggestions to help accomplish this goal.

1. Control your thoughts. Jesus said, “For out of the heart proceed evil thoughts, murders, adulteries, fornications…” (Matt. 15:19). So then if you can keep your thoughts pure, then your actions will be pure, too. Remember that lusting after a woman is really no different from committing adultery with her (Matt. 5:28). Paul told us to think on things that are pure, lovely, and of good report (Phil. 4:8). That means stay away from pornography. How can a person look at things that are intended to evoke evil thoughts and not have evil thoughts? That means stay away from movies, TV, and music with sexual content. That means avoid conversations with friends about these kinds of things. Guard your thoughts well and you will keep yourself pure.

2. Choose your dates and friends carefully. It is true that “Evil companionships corrupt good morals” (1 Cor. 15:33, ASV). We do tend to become like the people we associate with. If you associate with people who do not choose to remain sexually pure, then there will be added pressure on you to be like the rest of the crowd. Think very seriously about whom you date. What kind of reputation does that person have? If a person is known to be sexually active, you will likely be putting yourself in a situation where it will be more difficult to stay pure.

3. Make a commitment to your future mate to be pure. There is no better wedding gift you could give to your husband or wife than your own purity. Marriage is a beautiful relationship based on mutual love, respect, and trust. It is such an intimate relationship that God said husband and wife become one flesh (Gen. 2:24). For the married man, there should be no one on earth more precious to him than his wife. For the married woman, no one means as much to her as does her husband. It is a wonderful thing to be able to enter this relationship without having to wonder about who else has had your mate.

Regardless of age, every Christian must be sexually pure. But because of their age and our society, young people must commit themselves to remaining sexually pure. If you have done that so far, then keep it up. Don’t give in to the temptations you face. If you have not kept yourself pure, then make the commitment now that from this day forward you will be pure. Sex is a wonderful part of how God made us, but we must follow what He has said.